Something to Think About

Loving What Is

This is a topic that’s difficult to explain for many reasons. First, people will tell you that there are many valid reasons NOT to love what is. Secondly, I often find that people equate loving what is with accepting the world’s inequalities as OK, with no need to take action. They equate it with being a “doormat”. There are many other arguments against Loving what is, but let’s start with these two, and work up from there.

“Loving what is” is a fundamental teaching of many world traditions. Each of us has been given the gift of life, a gift that we spend one day at a time. Each of us has been given enough food, medicine, water, love and money to live our lives to whatever age we have currently achieved. In the process, we have learned about life, love, family, achievement, and our spiritual selves. Each day, we’re given a new opportunity to create the life of our dreams. Each new day is a gift, issued in finite quantities, to achieve again. Our goal, I believe, is to be present to the needs of ourselves, our loved ones, and our world, to take action to create the life of our dreams, and to live the life that we have imagined.

There is, in my opinion, a huge difference between resisting what is, and working to create a life of your dreams. Let’s take the controversial topic of abortion, for example. If you were to take a poll, I don’t think many people would consider themselves “Pro-Abortion”. Most women that I have talked to who consider themselves Pro-Choice consider abortion to be an unwanted alternative. (For the record, I am not pro-abortion either. I think it’s a tremendous waste of a life that could have been).  Each year, Abortion Protestors spend thousands (if not tens of thousands of hours or more) protesting, planning protests, (and resisting) Abortion. These Abortion Protestors, I think, really want a planet free from abortion. What affect would we have had on the abortion issue if each of these protestors had taken that same amount of time, energy, money and manpower and had instead devoted it to abortion alternatives? What if they had spent that time working on the development of responsible sex education programs, child adoption programs, crisis counseling, counseling centers where teenage girls could go when they learned of their pregnancy, family counseling centers, responsible parenting classes, etc?  The agencies currently devoted to these services often go understaffed, and underfunded. My personal belief is that if all of the Abortion Protestors would spend their time developing, staffing, and funding these abortion alternatives, the need for abortion and abortion protests would diminish dramatically, while at the same time our care for our society would increase.  Pro-lifers could spend their time developing, staffing, and funding these abortion alternatives as well instead of developing picket signs and handouts.

Let’s take George W. Bush’s War on Terror as another example. Islamic Fundamentalism is. At the present moment, we can’t change that. What we can do is create a world where Islamic Fundamentalism doesn’t need to kill others. What would have happened, for example, if we had taken the $864 Billion and all of the time and manpower spent on the “War on Terror” so far, and had used that money, time, and effort to build programs of understanding, to build world communication forums, programs for the understanding of other religions, etc.? Consider this a thought exercise. What programs of understanding and community could we have created with that same investment in money, energy and manpower (working to create what we do want), other than what we have already created with it (fighting what we don’t want)? There’s no concrete answer, of course, but my sense is that with that same investment of time, energy, manpower and money – we could have created something substantial – if we had wanted to.

What’s my point? My point actually has nothing to do with abortion nor the War on Terror. My point is that we accomplish much more by accepting, loving, working with, and developing what is, than we do with resisting, condemning, and trying to fight what is. We accomplish much more, in my opinion, by promoting the ideas we love and working to develop the society that we ultimately want to see, than we do by fighting to tear down the society that we don’t want, and arguing/fighting against the ideas we don’t like.  Loving what is has nothing to do with not working for change. Loving what is does not mean being a doormat and letting “what is ‘walk all over you’”. Loving what is means that you start with where you are, and with love, you begin to develop the life you do really want to live, and the society you want you, your family, and your loved ones to live in. It means building your new life, it means creating the society you want. It means building happiness, calming sadness, defusing anger, and creating anew. It means inclusion.

Resisting what is, on the other hand, creates an “Us versus them” mindset. It strengthens the determination of the opposition.  It fosters anger, resentment, fear, rage, and sadness. It leads to retaliation, destruction, isolation, and loss. It means excluding others.

Think of those whom you consider to be great leaders. What characteristics do those great leaders have in common? Many of the leaders that have been considered great throughout history are those that worked to develop that which they did want. Mahatma Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Jesus, Buddha, Confucius, John F Kennedy, America’s Founding Fathers, etc., were leaders with a vision. They knew where they wanted to take society. They had dreams of building a greater community. They worked to create equality. They worked to create what they wanted to achieve. Do the leaders you consider “Great” share the trait of working to build the life / society they wanted?

Are you working to achieve the life of your dreams? Are you taking constructive actions to make your life count, and make the world a better place? Will the world be a better place because of your actions? What will your legacy be? Will it be a legacy of building, loving, constructive action, greater community, helping others and creating the life of your dreams, or will it be a legacy of anger, divisiveness, isolation and resisting life as you see it?

Something to think about…..

September 12, 2009 - Posted by Mark | Leadership, Love | Leadership, Love