It took me a long time to fully learn this lesson.  When “I’m right and they’re wrong”, isn’t resistance the right and noble thing to do?  It took me years to understand the teaching of my elders, which says “What you resist, you give power to” – or – “What you resist, persists” – or – “When you resist, you get more of what you don’t want”.

Why is this so?  Isn’t it right to resist that which seems against our highest good?  The problems with resistance are these:

1. While resistance does bring us moments of righteous indignation, for the larger part, resistance also brings feelings of frustration, anger, disappointment, and/or weakness into our lives.
2. A second problem is that resistance actually strengthens the resolve of our “enemy”, and makes them more determined than ever to carry out their course of action.  They push harder.  They become more determined than they were previously to achieve their end goals – goals we don’t want them to achieve.  Simply put, the opposition grows stronger.  As the opposition grows stronger, we often feel our own resolve strengthening – and a titanic struggle often ensues.
3. A third – and related – problem is harder to understand, and isn’t immediately intuitive to me, yet I know it’s true.  The truth is that when you resist something, you are giving that problem or that person your personal power.  You are in effect saying “This has power over me” or “I am afraid of you” – and you experience fear.
4. A fourth problem is that we have only so much time and energy to expend in any given day.  The way you spend that day is your legacy, your gift to the world.  Every moment you have spent in resistance is a moment that you have not spent building the life and society of your dreams.

So, what do you want your life legacy to be?  I encourage you to build the life of your dreams – always.  Build your legacy.  Grow.  Become better.  Create a better life.  Understand that you have all that you need within you.

Something to think about….

A traditional Native American story describes a boy who was feeling angry and upset at an injustice, who goes to his old Grandfather for advice. The Grandfather tells the boy that he, too has felt these feelings of hate and anger. The Grandfather shares that he has also realized how these feelings have no effect on his enemy, but they do cause him great pain.

“It is as if I have two wolves living inside me,” says the Grandfather. “One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.”

“But the other wolf,” Grandfather continues, “fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. The smallest thing will send him into a fury. He cannot think because his anger and rage are so great; however for all its fury, his anger changes nothing.

“Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”

The boy looks into his Grandfather’s eyes and asks, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”

His grandfather replies, “Whichever one I feed.”

Kevin B. Burk http://www.therealastrology.com/ER/AMAZING/HTML/FeedingtheWolf.html

Have you experienced these wolves inside of you? If not, I congratulate you. For myself, I have certainly made friends with both of them. Over time, I too have come to realize that the angry wolf harms ME, and does not harm my “enemy”. Even if I act upon the angry wolf’s recommendations, my actions seem to hurt me more than they hurt someone else. On the other hand, the Good Wolf soothes me and makes me better able to handle the problems I face. Which one do I feed? I work to always feed the good wolf.

One of the significant truths that I have come to believe is that a lack of forgiveness can keep anger alive in us.  It keeps us angry, it raises our blood pressure, and it makes us less likely to handle everyday problems with grace and dignity. We tend to hold on to our unforgiveness, believing that holding on to that unforgiveness somehow harms the “enemy”. In my experience, holding on to that unforgiveness really harms me, while at the same time my “enemy” may not even be aware of (or care about) my unforgiveness. I’ve come to believe that it really boils down to a simple choice: Do I want to live my life with internal peace and daily enjoyment, or do I want to hold on to and act on my unforgiveness? If I want internal peace and daily enjoyment, I need to let go of the anger, the sense of injustice, and my unforgiveness. I can’t have inner peace and unforgiveness at the same time.

Secondly, many people I have talked to relate an experience of feeling like a doormat when they consider simply forgiving their “enemy”. In truth, extending forgiveness does not mean we should forget. In reality, in our state of forgiveness, we can still make daily choices about who we want to associate with, and who we will trust. If we need to protect ourselves or others, we can do so without the sense of inner rage that can accompany unforgiveness. Our protective action can simply be a responsible action that results from our desire to take care of our individual selves and others.

Lastly, I think that this holds true not only on a personal level, but also holds true for society as a whole.  Does that serve us well, or simply keep us from living a life of inner and outer peace?

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned. “

Buddha

Something to think about……